Alberta’s Got a Brand New Prime Minister
Alberta, Canada’s oil rich province, just got a new Premier (another name for the province’s Prime Minister of Provincial Government). Her name is Alison Redford, and one of her most controversial acts so far was to say that the government would be dumping the very unmemorable slogan that was introduced (with CDN$25 million fanfare) by the prior administration. You can hardly blame her. The slogan was “Freedom to Create, Spirit to Achieve” A nice thought, but not exactly an “I like Ike”, or “Yes, We Can” political touchstone, or country and western song title with a hook. So, being that sort of former Albertan who has the freedom to create and the spirit to achieve, I wrote the Prime Minister the following note (on October 29th, 2011):
“Looking for a new slogan for Alberta? As a big fan, and alumnus, I would like to offer my suggestion.
Alberta: Beauty, Environment, Energy, Prosperity
The “publicity” mnemonic is:
AB B.E.E.P.
It does really matter if the public remembers whether energy or environment comes first, what matters is that despite the [external/international] controversy of the XL pipeline and tar sands generally, that environment and natural beauty are treasured assets too. Alberta will not forget tourists flocked to Banff (and Calgary) before oil was ever discovered, and that appropriate measures to preserve the environment will be a priority from the prosperity that energy assets provide.
Sincerely,”
etc.
Okay, so my phrase didn’t set any house ablaze either, but the old “Alberta: Wild Rose Country” that used to grace their automobile license plates isn’t coming back any time soon. The wild rose images is a symbol of a rival political party. I actually believe in Alberta’s ability to balance these issues, and I am one of the few people I know who is actually a strong supporter of the tar sands pipeline, both for Canada’s prosperity, and for the USA’s national security. I know that with sufficient support I could convert the entire country (if not the whole world) to driving and flying on biofuels from algae in 6 months or less, but I am sorry to say that I realize that the predictions that the transition process with take 10 to 20 years is something of a self-fulfilling prophesy because it sets the tone and the pace of the race. We are going to go at tortoise speed, but at least we know from the old fable that the tortoise wins the race eventually.
It’s Appling Appalling !
What is so Appling Appalling !?? Well, it is a very sad sight (not site) that so many writers who have self-designated as “screenwriters” in the ubiquitous “Twitter” that now is the heart of the internet graffiti world, and yet just today, I encountered one “Twit” (and yes, I use the deprecating term instead of the more politically correct, “tweeter”) who was trying to make a serious point but completely undercut her own credibility when she typed (and did not correct) the term “are country”, meaning of course, “our country”. That is NOT a typographical error, folks. That is a plain and simple sign of ignorance, and although I have encountered the “spell and grammar checker” changing words on me, because it decided I meant something other than what I had typed, that is not the kind of mistake a grammar checker makes unless you are talking about C&W song titles. In that case it might have a rule that tried to correct something like “Shania and Dixie Chicks are country, but Madonna and Lady Gaga are not.” (of course it would freak out and change the verb if I had said “Madonna are not,” since Madonna and Lady Gaga separately are sufficiently schizophrenic to be pluralized). But lest you think a person, such as I, rants too much in light of the number of typos I include every day in everything I write, allow me to double the instances cited, remembering this was just in a less than 24 hour snapshot, indeed it was not much more than one hour on Tweetdeck that I saw the former and the following.
Another “twit” was complaining that something was not as it “should have been” and while I will allow that the internet spelling of “should” as “shud” is an acceptable “tweet” spelling, it was clearly out of ignorance, born of lack of a decent education that the writer strayed from the strait straight and narrow with a phrase that displayed the depth of inadequacy of proper vocabulary by saying “it shud of been better …” (meaning it “should have been”).
Now, I know that getting the “sound” of the language in one’s head goes a long way to speaking it (reasonably) correctly, but it is not enough to teach the “sounds” of a language if you expect to have a genuinely literate population. I know, at least in part, because I watch a class of English Language Learners just a couple of days ago. The “instructional aide” led the class through several pages of a workbook exercise in using the past progressive tense for both questions and assertions. I complemented the aide on his teaching ability as I left the classroom (after the regular teacher had returned from test proctoring) because I recognized that the immediate feedback of walking and talking the entire class through the written workbook exercise was far more effective than asking them to sit silently and write their answers to the questions posed. The immediacy of the feedback allowed them to connect the sounds of the correct tense being rendered, so that they should have (not “shud of”) been able to recognize the correctness of the “music” of the language associated with the meaning. The folks at Children’s Television Workshop (creators of “Sesame Street” and other great educational children’s programming for the last 30 years or more) are no dummies. They also created “Schoolhouse Rock” that created catchy little songs (not exactly “rock”, but at least “pop” in style) to teach more complex grammatical concepts like, “Conjunction Junction, What’s Your Function”, because the tunes make the facts easier to retain, and the choice of a train of railroad cars hooking up to form a train very nicely parallels the function of conjunctions in the language. Eventually, however, you have to go beyond the mere “music” of the language to attain a real understanding that “should’ve” is not “should of” despite the similarity. In fact, part of the problem is in the very sloppy way we (especially Americans) fail to correctly pronounce our words in the first place. “Are” is NOT the same sound as “hour” and strictly speaking “hour” is very, very close, but not exactly the same pronunciation as “our”. The difference is subtle, but it is one of the reasons that a British “public school” (their “upper class”) accent is so appealing to us in North America (yes, in Canada too, we are prone to swooning a little to hear the language treated with such care). Perhaps the best example I can demonstrate with phonetic spellings is the difference between “whales” and “Wales” (the country). “Wales” the country name is pronounced exactly like “wails”, the act of emitting loud exclamations of grief, often with varying and sliding changes in pitch, except that the country and the word “wails” do not themselves waiver in any way. “Whales” on the other hand is pronounced correctly as if it were spelled with the first two letters in inverted positions. That is to say, to pronounce “whales” correctly you say it more like “hw ales”. That means you are putting extra breath in front of the sound of the “w” (known as an aspirated “h” sound).
So, what can be done about all of this “ignorance”, fundamental failures of the education system to instill an understanding of the language, speech and writing? There are some innovative and useful programs that help. IBM’s “Writing to Read” is one that has received a lot of praise, but has also encountered a lot of resistance. I am going to propose a different tack. I suggest we need to get over our fear or aversion or whatever it is/was for “rote learning”, that is, learning through repetitive performance whether that might be speaking aloud, reading or writing. We do seem to understand, still, that teaching children to write letters is a learned skill that takes practice. Addition and subtraction are still taught (sometimes, if at all) by repeating the addition, subtraction, multiplication and division tables. But that isn’t always true either. I have noticed a lot of classrooms over the past decade that don’t bother to insist that students learn multiplication tables. They have them posted on the classroom walls, and have a “cheat sheet” of the multiplication tables in their notebooks or on their desks so that in the event that the batteries in their calculators are growing weak, they can simply look up the necessary “fact”. Calculators may be cheap and plentiful, but I certainly hope that actually understanding number concepts is never displaced by the “but I have a calculator for that”. I have seen graduating projects from Masters Degree students that were mistaken by two orders of magnitude in thier calculations because they relied upon their computer to do the calculations, and trusted the result without ever realizing that they input contained errors so the computer could not possibly give them the correct answers. These were not stupid people. On the contrary, they were among the brightest, but they were missing the fundamental understanding that you test a mathematical conclusion by a process of inverse operations to prove that the initial result is correct.
I would love to get hold of a karaoke machine with a “speed control” (in effect a tempo control) (most of these machines actually do have a “speed control” that changes the pitch, without changing the pace), that allowed me to learn the Tom Lehrer adaptation of a Gilbert and Sullivan tune to become “The Elements Song”. I’m a bright guy, but I have never sat down and learn every element name, and it serves me ill in everyday life as I try to understand chemical formulae for exotic catalysts used to tranform one substance into another. That may sound like “magic” and it truly is the same kind of magic that the “Alchemists” of old were seeking when they attempted to tune other substances into gold. At that time they did not realize that “gold” was an “element” and therefore could neither be transformed into another elemental substance, nor could other pure elemental substances be transformed into gold. And yet, every day organic chemicals become plastics, waxes become fuels, and carbon combines with oxygen to become carbon dioxide as part of our biological processes. The organic chemicals to plastics, however is one of those that typically needs some exotic chemical element as a reaction enabling substance (known as a catalyst) for the various elements to organize into long resilient strings of molecules that make up the malleable plastic substances. Take a moment and try to imagine how rapidly we humans might find solutions to problems if every 8th grader knew every element’s name, and found it fun to learn because of the silly song that taught them? Well, guess how many kids would be able to sing the “Conjunction Junction” song if it hadn’t been broadcast to their ears about a hundred times a year from the ages of 4 to 7. Of course, to know the value of this fundamental programming of children, teachers would have to learn the lyrics too, and that may be where we go astray. Teachers don’t believe in rote learning any more. It doesn’t fit with “modern” educational theory, and it’s “childish” for them to go around learning from “nursery rhymes”, especially ones their students already know better than they do. Well, I suggest we “get over it”, and take advantage of this natural gift we have of being able to retain information better when it has music and requires specific pitches and cadences to learn it. It just works. This is definitely a baby that should never have been thrown out with the bathwater.
Love and warm wishes,
Sincerely,
Stafford “Doc” Williamson
President
DaoChi Energy of Arizona
DaoChiEnergy.com
Lifestyle.psyrk.us